(Blonde Beard = Fucking Creepy)
So apparently this 62-year old genius got so mad about the fact his beloved Alabama Crimson Tide lost to Auburn that he decided the logical thing to do is to drive to Auburn's campus and poison the 130 year old oak trees in Toomer's Corner, the place Auburn douches with TP after big wins. I love the spirit, but the asshole could have easily gotten away with it if he wasn't such a fucking dumb redneck with a blonde beard.
Instead of keeping the crime, and yes this is a crime, to himself, he decides to call Dan Patrick on his radio show and brag about it. Needless to say, it gets him arrested and in hot water nationally. The best part is, this guy is a retired state trooper. The system works!
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